The Fall

There was a time
I once thrived
in the rat race,
lived for it
justifying my self-imposed
“busy bee” life
with idioms like
“idle time is the devil’s playground.”
Because to sit still
caused frustration,
self-loathing,
emotional restlessness,
feelings of stagnation…
But with the change
in weather
came a change
in my trajectory.
Running in circles,
wanting so desperately
to jump off that hamster wheel --
only to land
in a pool of idle indulgence.
In the absence of controlled hysteria
I have fallen and
I might not get up.